Autumn’s fragility and deep musings on life…

We are quickly approaching my LEAST favorite time of the year. That “post fall but not quite winter” time of year. The other day I was sitting on my front steps with my kids and I became simply mesmerized with the colors, textures, and sounds of autumn all around.

It was warm, I had coffee, my kids were laughing, there was a gentle breeze, people were out riding bikes through the fallen leaves. It was glorious. I sat sipping my coffee and watching the leaves fall off my neighbors tree thinking how beautiful it all was, and how quickly it was going to turn ugly. BUM, BUM, BAAAAAA!!! I know, I know.  I’m not usually such a pessimist, but I honestly don’t enjoy that phase between fall and winter, or between winter and spring.  The time when everything is brown, and dead, and waiting. So, while I watched these leaves fall with rapture, I couldn’t help but dread their inevitable decay. It did occur to me that maybe it would be nicer to have trees who’s leaves never fell.  That always remained lush and perfectly green.  That never required any raking. But then of course I would miss this color.

What if dandelions never changed?  They might never turn ugly, they might remain yellow and bright.  But then we would miss out on all the fun of blowing a wish.

If I had the chance to choose to never live through that dreary post-fall phase of the year but also never experiencing the pure joy of autumn, I would choose the dreary part. I just love the fall.  I’d miss it. And maybe part of the joy of this season is knowing how short and precious it is.

Our tree hasn’t changed yet.  My husband says it’s because it’s so young. It’s healthy so the changes take longer. It’s just like life right.  Short, precious, beautiful but fleeting.  Harder to adjust to when we are young, changing all too quickly once we’re old.

Have you ever stepped on a lego with bare-feet first thing in the morning? It is the WORST!!  I would literally rather go to the dentist. But would I trade this lego strewn phase for a booby-trap free floor every morning? Never. I’m going to soak up every floor (and sidewalk) covered in these brick-beauties for as long as I can.  Because it, just like the fall, will be over far too quickly. And I’m going to try and not waste my time dreading its all too soon and eventual end. I’m going to simply enjoy its beautiful presence. I’m loving walking through this phase of life.

Legos, dead leaves and all.

About trinakhobbs
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